When the “Change” happened, it hit in every sector of the population. The earliest reports naturally spoke about urban areas and seats of power as those places were already in the spotlight and were the they were the easiest to cover. But the truth is that nowhere was safe from the spread of the contagion that heralded the zombie apocalypse. A perfect example: Critter Creek Nebraska, population 1,247 when the change occurred. Not too much here besides some grain silos, a crumbling drive-in theater and a gas-station/convenience store the Gas & Grub. If you were passing through town you wouldn’t be able to miss the good ‘ol G&G, and if the place was open you would see a nondescript guy behind the counter, just another background person you forget about once you pass by. That guy, that was Fred, or rather Frederic as he preferred in his old life.
Frederic spent his entire life in Critter Creek, the last twenty-two behind the counter of the Gas & Grub. Frederic pretty much figured it was an ideal situation, nothing too challenging work wise, a day shift job, benefits, and all the slushies he could drink; even a little studio apartment in back where the service bay used to be. Yeah, Frederic was content with his life, putting in just enough effort to stay off the radar; sell a few scratchers , ID for cigarettes and beer, and make the cash drops exactly when they needed to be made. Frederic made it easy for everyone around him to push him into the background of their world, doing a job they would never even consider…And then there was Mr. Chuckles.
If you were to set foot in Frederic’s studio apartment behind the gas station (and few, if anyone, would have a reason to) you would believe you were setting foot into an old circus trailer, you know the ones you see in old movies, when the Circus parade would come to town. Frederic spent every cent he could spare on every costume, poster, and bit of paraphernalia he could track down from the great circus era. Fred had managed to cram an impressive collection of memorabilia into the space, and even more in storage lockers throughout the county. The centerpiece of the apartment, a vintage make-up table and mirror salvaged from a long forgotten circus caravan, laid out with the tell tale wigs, greasepaint and big red nose of a clown. Yes, deep down Frederic longed for the spotlight and the life as a circus clown. After the G & G closed, he would make his way back to the apartment and apply the paint, the wig, the nose, don his costume and he was Mr. Chuckles. If this all sounds a bit creepy and weird, well you probably would not be shocked at what he had hidden in one of those lockers he rented.
Frederic tried to actualize his dream, Mr. Chuckles appeared at parades, store openings, and the occasional kids birthday, but Fred never understood one thing. He was not good, talentless would be more precise, at least when it came to entertaining. Sure, he looked the part, but he just wasn’t funny; and a clown who is not funny, is well… just plain scary. We are not just talking about making toddlers cry, we are talking about grown men taking the service exit to avoid being near him scary. And while Frederic could handle frustration, Mr Chuckles, not so much. Mr Chuckles just did not deal well with hecklers, and it was only matter of time until somebody pushed him too far and saw what scary really was.
As “The Change” spread across the country like creamy peanut butter over a warm piece of toast, Mr. Chuckles had amassed enough trophies, from his critics,that he was considering a new storage unit. Mr. Chuckles eyed the calendar with a big red circle around the date for the Birthday party for an over-privileged eight year old, and called in the deposit on a new locker. The Government warnings to stay indoors may have kept Frederic inside, but it was Mr. Chuckles who climbed into the bright yellow microbus and ventured to that party.
Mr. Chuckles didn’t even have time to get everything set up before he saw the group of kids. Now Mr. Chuckles was not only scary and untalented, he was also not very bright, looking at the blank-eyed pack of pallid skinned shambling eight year old’s his only thought was that he should have been warned that the party had a zombie theme. As the pack staggered towards him (possibly even zombie children are afraid of clowns) Mr. Chuckles launched into his repertoire of balloon animals. He started with something that might have been a puppy, or it could have been a cow, handing it off to the birthday boy, who promptly bit into it with a loud POP! A balloon hat tiara next, placed carefully atop the head of the little zombie princess staggering towards his leg. POP. Chuckles was about a third of the way through what appeared to be a swan (with three wings?), when he felt the teeth sink into his arm, then Mr. chuckles disappeared under the mass of mini-zombies. What pulled itself back to the microbus resembled an abused sock-puppet, then Mr. Chuckles made his last costume change and emerged from the van as Undead Fred.
Fred still wears the greasepaint and a big red nose hides the fact that one of the child zombies bit off his real nose. In death, he has become the full-time clown he wanted to be in life, granted he is still not very funny, but he is un-living the dream; frequenting parks looking for children to lure away with a smile and a balloon.
Undead Fred is available as a full color 12″ x 18″ target printed on 70 lb paper from YKY Limited. He is one of three zombies included in the Zombie Apocalypse 12 pack or go ahead and order a bulk lot. Fred is even is one of the buttons featured in our button pack. Easy to score, fun to shoot. Perfect for range days, training, or even framing, order today and share your shooting experiences on the YKY Facebook Page. Go on… order, you know you want to.
When the Zombie Apocalypse comes …