No matter who you talk to about the end of the world, they are gonna share their personal experiences, tell you what they miss, maybe talk about body count. We have moved beyond the why of it. Why this happened was a luxury that we thought about as zombies decimated we few survivors. It was speculation we watched on newscasts and YouTube, posted as memes on Facebook, and retweeted as celebrities threw in their two cents. Sheltering in our homes we could wonder if it was a government conspiracy, a terrorist attack or the wrath of God. People would point to signs of the apocalypse, screaming in all caps that we should have seen it coming, and more than one person cited reality TV as the one of the four horsemen. Which of the four remains a matter of personal speculation, I kinda go with pestilence, but the zombies themselves seem to have that wrapped up. Case in point: Nuclear Naomi.
Naomi, was very typical of the minor grade celebrity who was generated by the metric ton through social media. Naomi was one of those faces and names you knew, but really did not know why, she was famous for being famous. Naomi seemed to have the formula down, getting her start as an “internet model” baring just enough of her surgically enhanced body to drive guys wild. By the time her internet clicks were at their peak, there wasn’t any part of her that had not been nipped, tucked, or implanted. She was hot enough that she only had to go with a single name, and you only had to type in the first two letters before search engines started auto-filling the rest. Modeling got her the attention to lock her in as the girl you love to hate on reality TV; a pretty face with an attitude, and a short fuse. She was perfect for pretty much any show based on the premise that pretty people with with extreme personalities thrown together for an extended period of time = entertainment. Naomi was a shoe-in the day she walked into the casting director’s office for one of those dating shows; the high school mean queen grown up. Pretty, self-centered, and just unhinged enough that she could be directed towards the kinds of conflict that make great TV. Everyone watching knew she would not win, but did not want to see her go.When she finally got the boot towards the end of the season, she did not go quietly, taking a swing at the pseudo-celebrity host of the show, and trying to set fire to the house that all of the shows contestants were in. There it was, the next day everyone knew who “Nuclear Naomi” was; just like everyone knew some producer was going to bring her back for a follow up show. Naomi’s career kicked into high gear; follow-up show at a Caribbean resort, celebrity judge on a talent show, then we watched as she went into therapy with 5 other celebrities whose behavior at times bordered on the criminal. Naomi knew how to play the game, between contracts she maintained her social media buzz. Anytime her recognition started to fade, a twitter cat fight here, a socially incorrect comment on Facebook there, a red carpet wardrobe malfunction every so often and she popped back onto TMZ, and locked down yet another TV show.
When “The Change” hit, Naomi was negotiating to appear on a celebrity home rehab/ cooking / travel show, a brilliant new concept sure to pull in advertisers from three markets, and lock down a huge market share of viewers. Naomi knew that the competition to get on the show was high, and knew zombies might be the key to securing her spot. Championing the hashtag #ZombiesArePeople2 (yes two not too), Naomi began posting selfies with her post-evolutionary fans. Her social media accounts began a non-stop stream of selfies with the green skinned blood smeared maniacs the rest of the world was hiding from. Yeah, there was no way this was going to go well…
Naomi tweeted her last duckface while shopping in Beverly Hills, well if you call wandering through a looted lingerie store shopping. That was when a pack found her, and Naomi could not pass an such a great photo op with so many fans. She might have actually have been safe, between the surgically enhanced body, and levels of foreign substances in her bloodstream, the zombies were not really sure she was edible, but a couple took a bite just to make sure, and that was it, Naomi was infected.
Unlike most of the zombies shuffling endlessly, Naomi is easy to pick out in a crowd. The surgical enhancements that shaped her career (pun intended… sorry) have held up and she almost looks human, except for the rotting green skin. She is always happy to see survivors, thinking of them as fans-in-waiting, and will try to get a selfie with her ever present, if broken and signal-less phone. Just watch it, when she gets that close, those zombie instincts kick in and she will take a bite now that she can eat all the brains she wants and never gain an ounce.
Nuclear Naomi is available as a full color 12″ x 18″ target printed on 70 lb paper from YKY Limited. She is one of three zombies included in the Zombie Apocalypse 12 pack or go ahead and order a bulk lot. Naomi is even is one of the buttons featured in our button pack. Easy to score, fun to shoot. Perfect for range days, training, or even framing, order today and share your shooting experiences on the YKY Facebook Page. Go on… order, you know you want to.
When the Zombie Apocalypse comes …